Go to church ev’ry Sunday,
People always ask “How you doing?”
I always reply, “I’m doing just fine.”
But lately I’ve felt like a hypocrite
Hiding behind those words–
‘Cause really it seems like I’m falling apart.
I say I’m fine, but I’ve been havin’ some struggles.
I say I’m fine, but I’ve been losin’ my battles.
I say I’m fine, but I’m giving in to despair.
I say I’m fine, but I’m falling away from God.
I’ve been fightin’ with my mom,
And my dear ol’ dad once questioned me:
“What happened to my happy little girl?”
All I can think is that happy girl died
And she’s not coming back. . .
But still I say I am doing just fine.
I say I’m fine, because it’s hard for me to talk.
I say I’m fine, because I think I can fix it.
I say I’m fine, ’cause I’m hoping it’ll be done soon.
But I can’t seem to shake it, I don’t have the strength.
I don’t like when others ask
How my walk with God is comin’ ‘long;
But I know that they ask because they care,
And that it’s for my own good, to keep me
From this place of hiding,
Hiding behind the words of “I’m doing fine.”
So when I say I’m fine, ask me to explain why.
When I say I’m fine, dig just a bit deeper in.
Don’t always just accept my words and move right on.
You need to look harder, ’cause I’m not always “fine”. . .
~Julie Hochstetler, June 2018
These words (along with Truth Be Told) seemed fitting after my last post.
P.S. I can’t decide which I want to do first: a series of posts on Psalm 23 or a series of posts on Jonah. Which intrigues you more? 😉
Julie, thanks for sharing. There are many of us that, likely too often, hide behind those 2 lil words! Both of your next topics are tempting, maybe comfort of Psalm 23 first.
Yes, way too many of us, way too often, hide instead of being honest and open. But I’m learning that honesty (and humility) leads to healing.
Someone else voted Jonah, so I might wait for a tie-breaker! 😄
Thank you for commenting! 🤗
I think it would be very interesting to see your thoughts on Jonah
Thanks for your input! My parents also voted for Jonah, especially since I did recently do two posts about Psalm 23 (Love Pursues and Love Pursues, Part 2). So I guess Jonah will be the first series and then I’ll do Psalm 23! 😊
Unless more people vote for Psalm 23. 😉